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- The Doctor: Duggan, why is it that every time I start to talk to someone, you knock them unconscious?
- The Doctor: I say; what a wonderful butler, he's so violent!
- The Countess Scarlioni: I was rather under the impression that it was Mr. Duggan who was following me.
- The Doctor: Ah. Well, you're a beautiful woman, probably; and Duggan was trying to sum up the courage to ask you to dinner. Weren't you, Duggan?
- The Countess Scarlioni: Who sent you?
- The Doctor: Who sent me what?
- Duggan: Can anyone join in this conversation, or do you need a certificate?
- The Doctor: Theodore Nikolai Kerensky, a scientist's job is to ask questions.
- The Doctor: Leonardo? You remember the Mona Lisa? That dreadful woman with no eyebrows who wouldn't sit still?
- The Doctor: If there's one thing I can't stand, it's being tortured by someone with cold hands.
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: Doctor, how very nice to see you again. Seems like only 474 years since we last met.
- The Doctor: Indeed, indeed, yes. I so much prefer the weather in the early part of the 16th century, don't you?
- Romana II: Where are we going?
- The Doctor: Are you speaking philosophically or geographically?
- Romana II: Philosophically.
- The Doctor: Then we're going to lunch.
- Duggan: You know what I don't understand?
- Romana II: I expect so.
- The Doctor: I suppose the best way to find out where you come from is to find out where you're going, and then work backwards.
- The Doctor: I wouldn't make a very good criminal, would I?
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: No. [brandishes pistol] Good criminals don't get caught.
- The Doctor: May I ask where you got these?
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: No.
- The Doctor: Or how you knew they were here?
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: No.
- The Doctor: They've been walled up a long time?
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: Yes.
- The Doctor: I like concise answers!
- Count Scarlioni/Scaroth: Good.
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