Dr who forth doctor quotes The Pirate Planet

The Doctor: You're not doing very well, K9.

K9: Master?

The Doctor: No.

K9: Suggestion, Master.

The Doctor: What?

K9: Suggest you allow Mistress to make contact.

The Doctor: Nonsense! Making contact with an alien race is an immensely skilled and delicate operation. It calls for tact and experience- what would she know about it?

Romana I: Excuse me...

K9: She is prettier than you, Master.

The Doctor: Is she? What's that got to do with it?

The Doctor: Where did you get those jelly babies?

Romana I: Same place you get them.

The Doctor: Where?

Romana I: Your pocket.

The Doctor: Good looks are no substitute for a sound character.

The Doctor: Extraordinary! The place is littered with them! Diamonds...Andromedan Bloodstones...gravel.

The Doctor: Has anybody seen a planet called Calufrax?

The Doctor: Excuse me, are you sure this planet's meant to be here?

Guard: This is a forbidden object.

Romana I: Why?

Guard: That is a forbidden question. You are a stranger?

Romana I: Well, yes.

Guard: Strangers are forbidden.

Romana I: I did come with the Doctor.

Guard: Who is-

Romana I: Ah, now, don't tell me, Doctors are forbidden as well.

The Doctor: Hullo? Are you by any chance the Mentiads?

The Doctor: It's just that...you look like Mentiads to me...

Guard: Get in

Romana I: I shall take that as an invitation. [Hands guard telescope] Thank you. [Climbs in] Will you drive? I assume you know where we're going.

The Doctor: It's an economic miracle! Of course it's wrong.

Kimus: Do you drive these things for a living?

The Doctor: No. I save planets, mostly.

The Doctor: Well, I just put 1.795372 and 2.204628 together.

Romana I: And what does that mean?

The Doctor: Four!

The Doctor: A plank!?

The Captain: The theory is very simple. You walk along it. At the end you fall off. Drop 1000 feet. Dead.

The Doctor: You can't be serious!

Mr. Fibuli: Captain, sir.

The Captain: Speak, Mr. Fibuli.

Mr. Fibuli: The Psychic Interference Transmitter, sir; There seems to be something counter-jamming it.

The Captain: What!? We Dematerialize in three minutes! [into a loudspeaker] ALL GUARDS ON ALERT! SOMEONE IS USING A COUNTER-JAMMING FREQUENCY PROJECTOR! FIND IT AND DESTROY IT IMMEDIATELY!!!

Mr. Fibuli: Captain, do you suppose any of the guards know what a "Counter-Jamming Frequency Projector" looks like?

Pause

The Captain: DESTROY EVERYTHING!!!

Romana I: Newton? Who's Newton?

The Doctor: Old Isaac. Friend of mine on Earth. Discovered gravity. Well, I say he discovered gravity, I had to give him a bit of a prod.

Romana I: What did you do?

The Doctor: Climbed up a tree.

Romana I: And?

The Doctor: Dropped an apple on his head.

Romana I: Ah, and so he discovered gravity?

The Doctor: No, no. He told me to clear off out of his tree. I explained it to him afterwards at dinner